Greetings from the Space Noodle! (Seattle) Or ... "How I met Jack Keruoac."
Any of you who receved annoying phone messages at 4:30 am: I can explain!
(But I'm NOT SORRY! Ha,ha,ha!)
Yes, indeed, it was one o' them wild nights. If your answering machine has a guy on it saying, "Greetings from the Space Noodle" from a Seattle cell phone number, or even better, "I AM THE SPACE NOODLE!" then consider yourselves priviledged, and by the way yes, he IS the Space Noodle, and furthermore, consider yourselves lucky 'cuz some people don't even HAVE friends who will take the time to CALL THEM in the middle of the night, and I'm almost sorry too (for you!) but not really, and I'll do it again and now I'll tell you how this awesome phone masterbationexploitation came to pass. Here goes:
WHO IS the Space Noodle??
Met him in a coffee shop at midnight, we both had a cute girl with us, but we wanted to switch (Ha!) and not only that, we wanted them both, no ... wait! We wanted them together (and by the end of the night they were) and he was wearing sunglasses at midnight, which was so cool that I had to don my own, and said they were prescription (coolest fib EVER!) and then it even turned out to be TRUE and that was even cooler, and furthermore, we brought them over to our table (I think I kissed 2 outta three, more on this later ...) and it was, well, basically one of those poetry-jam nights where everything gets a little outta control (that's a good thing!) and we talked about Keruoac and then actually became Keruoac for a brief moment between sips on shitty american beer, and yes I kissed my girl thinking of another, but it was cool, 'cuz she wanted to kiss HER (and then DID!) while Space Noodle was chatting up cute girls on State Street going, "Hey, you wanna make out?" like the awesome hipster that he is, and the one in the courderoy hat (And how DO you spell "courderoy" anyway, Roy?") almost went for it, but then we kept on movin', and at some point had to go out for mo beer, and some random guy gave me 5 bucks to pay for the extra booze at the store, saying something about, "Good Karma comes around and goes around, Dawg," and then he burped and moved on, and I say thank you angel, for showing me that it's not ALL bad out there, and yes we were out there, and then we're back out on the street and walking and we were suddenly in "West Side Story" snapping our fingers in unison and being Jets (yes, we WERE Jets for a few minutes) and walking and humming the West Side tunes to passersby, who occasionally played along and whistled/hummed back, and our man was now shirtless, even he himself saying, "How'd that happen?" and we were skipping along, enjoying life and avoiding the fuzz and yes, we were in our own musical, and he kept quoting neat-o quotes from 50's books like the "Hipster handbook" and other frivolous/beautiful legendary notebooks and stuff, and we were briefly in Paris (where my smoochgal on this evening was BORN!) and then we were suddenly in Seattle in out minds' eye, going, "Isn't the Space Needle wonderful this time of year, my dear?!" and "Oh, yes, it is lovely and dreary here up on top of the Space Needle!" and then someone (mightta been me) said, "Oh yes, the Space Noodle is wonderful!" which turned into, "We're on top of the Space Noodle!" which turned into, "I AM the Space Noodle!" which, of course, makes perfectly good sense when you're strutting down the boulevard shirtless singing Broadway tunes at 2 in tha morn with two babes on your arms, which are bare to the world and hairy, and snapping and singing, and so you see, the phone calls were COMPLETELY in order, in fact I should've got my shit together and called MORE of you (from the Space Noodle). He IS the Space Noodle.
And we went to every place, covered every subject under the sun and then some, son ... we solved every world crisis and suburban nightmare, discussed every relevant book and irrelevant band and irreverent reverand, and came close to the ultimate jam, but we gotta keep searchin' for it! And this was ALL IN ONE NIGHT! And my man was outrageous and cool and oh-sooo good with his mind. Not "so-so", yo-yo!
He did the coolest hip-flip jumping off-tha-wall dance moves, and said, "Wanna make out?" to the coolest beautiful people who had no time, but took the time, and yes, he is the Space Noodle, and he may have even said to me at some point, "Hey - wanna make out?" and so what, but I didn't and was completely focused on the other things like Dan from Seattle watchin' the rest of us make out and dancin' in the streets and didn't Bill and Ted have an excellent adventure, yes it really was, and who says punk is dead and who says peace don't have no chance and who says underage people can't buy absynthe in america and who says that poetry liveth no more and who says we can't make a difference and who says he ISN'T the Space Noodle? for we all know he is, and who says the founding father didn't have slaves and who says Keruoac's dead and who says there is no right time and place and by the way ...
WHO HAS MY SUNGLASSES??
Must of left them in the pub or the coffee shop or the Gas 'n' Sip or the 2 am long-walk to nowhere gas station, or maybe the transvestite hookers (Yes, the TRANSVESTITE HOOKERS!) took 'em, (they said, "Mmmm ... college boys!) but whoever has 'em, give 'em back, or I may just have to instigate another one of these nights and call ALL OF YOU!!!!!
Heh.
Thank you friends, for a beautiful night!!!!!!!
Peace. -Todd